Thursday, August 03, 2017

The Importance of Non-Reciprocal Sex

Week Four, Day Three: LUST
Enjoy this side of life: SEX EVERY DAY

And we aren’t talking, just the “usual” kind
Three flavors
At least one of the flavors every day
Really?
Yes

This is silly easy and so few people have this as part of their daily nourishment.
Just like being outside has to be part of your life.
Just like being present and in gratitude and in your body has to be part of your life.

What?
Gratitude
Keep a gratitude journal. You remember the story: your brain can be in gratitude or fear.
Be in gratitude.

Outside: go outside about once every two hours, if not more often.
Nature is God in the form almost everyone can feel and resonate to.

Be present: as much as you can.
Why? Feel the sleeping/ robot quality of life when you aren’t present.
In your body: we have a body.
Sense it.

And sex:
A great chance to be in nature, as in the nature of our body as the miracle invented by evolution for living in an amazing way on this planet earth.
A wonderful excuse to experience the present as
Pleasure and
Connection with hints of
Love

And what sorts of sex would be good for your life as a daily nourishment?
There is the “usual.”
That’s fine, great, glorious and this book will be leaving that to you and your partner to discover how to radically improve that.

What we do want is two alternatives to the “usual” sex.
Both are non-reciprocal.
Which means, one is ALL FOR HER.
And, guess what, one is ALL FOR HIM.

The All for Her one, we’ve already talked about one. FEMALE ORGASM AWARENESS MEDITATION.
Stroking her clitoris. Gently.
With great attention and connection.
For a set amount of time: 8, 10 or 13 minutes.
Without the goal of climax.
With the goal of heightened and deeply present CONNECTION.

This is good for people, for couples every day, or every other day.

And then the other half: Something ALL FOR HIM.
And this is the old fashioned, she sucks his penis.
Except it’s RADICALLY DIFFERENT.
MINDFUL PENIS SUCKING.
Is not the same old same old.
She isn’t trying to win points.
She isn’t trying to “get him off.”
She is in the moment, and learning and not at all sure what the next moment is going to be.
She is enjoying each moment.
He is enjoying each moment.
Great value can come from slower and softer.
Greater than great value can come from exploration and discovery

THIS IS PLAY FOR ADULTS.  MINDFUL PLAY. MINDFUL SPONTANEOUS PLAY.
No pressure.
Lotsa pleasure.

Remember:
No goal of climax.
Slowing down and backing off when it “gets too hot.”
Letting mutual pleasure and connection in THE PRESENT MOMENT be the guide.
Let mutual PLEASURE & CONNECTION in the PRESENT moment be the guide.
Set a timer. Slightly less: 5, 8 or 10 minutes.
When it’s over, it’s over.
Get dressed and go for a walk.

You might be tempted to jump into “usual” sex.
Wait a month of so.
Get used to just him.
Get used to just her.
You’d be amazed how a ten minute clitoris stroke, or a ten minute penis suck can change a day that looks like it’s coming unglued.
You need to know you’ve got a short and amazing alternative to pretending that you don’t have a great sex life.

Talk about nothing on the walk.
Or talk about gratitude.
And what you love.
And what you are aware of in that moment. (Not how, “oh wow” it was back in the sucking mode. Let the pleasure be the pleasure when it’s happening.
That’s good enough.

Now to make it all bold face, in case you want to find just the “game” of the day>>>>

Lust Game # 12: Mindful Penis Sucking (MPS)

Rub his thighs for two minutes first.
Then suck, mindfully for a set amount of time, 5, 8 or 10 minutes. No more for quite a while. Let it end with both of you still ablaze.
This blaze will fuel something, deep and subtle and amazing.

Suck slowly, and for learning, mutual pleasure and connection.
No goal, except awareness and pleasure in the moment.
Feel the real sensations, not your ideas about “how it’s going” or “where it should/ could go.”
Let the timer tell you when to stop sucking mindfully.
When you immediately stop the mindful sucking, then gently and with no “messing around”, hold his penis for a minute or two to calm things down. Do this, too, please, as a mindfulness meditation in touch and connection.

When’s it’s over, it’s over.
Go for a walk.
Talk about gratitude, what you love, what you are aware of.
Or: nothing.

This is a strange chapter near the end of the book and it’s absolutely necessary to a yummy life.
She needs to give him time to pleasure her in the FOAM practice, when she simply lays back and takes it all in.
He need to give her time to pleasure him in the Mindful Sucking practice, while he simply lays back and takes it all in.

The pressure to blow off the pleasure with climax is huge.
Pass it by.
You’ll see why.
Not right away.
But you will see why.

It’s about allowing the moment to flood with pleasure.
It’a about being present to way higher pleasure than you think you deserve.
It’s about being full.
It’a about being flooded.

It’s about giving and receiving.
It’s about having two sexual practices that can stand alone in great bliss and presence.
It’s about connection.

Don’t believe me?
No reason you need to.
This is for you to discover.
This is a deep learning.
Deep.

Try out each one every other day for a week or two and see what happens.
Summary of Week Four, Day Three: LUST
Non-reciprocal sex is fuel for a blissful life.
Sometimes ALL FOR HER.
Sometimes ALL FOR HIM.
Mindfulness.
Awareness.
Pleasure.
Flooding.
Good.
Great.

Yes!!

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