Day 9: Some story and a nature orientation to our mindfulness

 Home grown food, in a second big garden in Sonoma, a later story, the Chris and Marlie story.

But food and land and sleeping outside and making big gardens (the smallest at 1/3 acre, the largest at 3 out of an available 5 acres) are part of the running theme of Sonoma. (And Feldenkrais/ Anat Baniel come along then. And the work of Byron Katie. Good times. Below's a beginning introduction.)

Once upon a time I was enthralled with healing the Earth. I am dedicated to it, just now, but not enthralled. But then, I was living in Berkeley and making a living taking advantage of landscape design and garden creating as chance to do the Gurdjieff meditation full time, and was more or more obsessed with high quality food and the Berkeley farmers markets. I got to know the farmers, got to love and thrive on the food and had this wish: move to the country, become an organic farmer, do it.

This gal I was with, Jeri Lynn, was a garden lover too, and she finished her masters degree in Landscape Architecture and we both wanted out of Berkeley, no matter how amazing it was. To top that off, I’d had the good fortune to “try” out a Permaculture course, and Bill Mollison was one of the two teachers, and my question of “How in the hell are they going to teach about gardening for two weeks,” become, “How did I not know this system for relating to the Earth as a whole? I wanted access to land.

We found the place: Sonoma, California, about an hour from the bay area. We visualized a cottage with meadow and woods and creek and got them. There was a public garden, 5 acres donated by a school teacher on her death to the city of Sonoma, being managed by the Sonoma Ecology Center. The farmer there was going crazy.

After a summer of growing amazing food and making about 50 cents a pound on organic tomatoes, I was ready to take advantage of this land, which needed a visionary and an active garden maker, but I didn’t want a farm. I wanted a total permaculture ecological demonstration garden. There was already a water system and a straw bale barn on the place, and I put in grape arbors and paths and created a double ring of fruit trees with a circumferences of 150 and 130 feet. Vegetables inside. Lavender and thyme and rose beds elsewhere.

The Garden continues, now called the Sonoma Garden park. I got about 3 acres up and running ( there was a square orchard already as part of the given), and then this and that happened.

That’s for later.

For now, for today, to continue the mindfulness play:

take nature into your mindfulness practice today.

See how much time you can sneak or creak or zip or zap outdoors and spend time walking or bike riding or swimming, with a couple of places for your attention.

One: the glory of nature.

Two: your body in motion, and the pleasure of that, and the actual sensation of where your arms and legs and spine-pelvis-head are.

Three: the light coming in thing.

Four: the sound coming in thing.

Five: Feelings and thoughts as flickerings. Be mindful of them as additions to the first four and then come back to now and nature, if you can.

Gently.

If we yank ourselves into being present, it’s not really going to work.
Nature (usually) doesn't yank (though the waves do crash and the lightning does strike and the fires do burn, and today: let's do the breezes and the grass growing up to delight in the sun aspect of our nature.

Love and learning in the world of special needs children parents

Each day is a chance, for your child to learn something,
some little connection,
some little difference,
or to learn a difference a little better,
the big toe and the little toe,
or to learn a connection a little more clearly,
the heel and the hip,

that's what brains are for,
when used to make our lives
bigger and better:
they discover, note and make rewiring to be able to use again
this:
differences that make a difference.

Feed your child's brains:
differences,
variations,
options,
possibilities.

Make it new and fresh
for them,
and you,
the delightful worlds of continuous discovery.

This is why I think
it's so wonderful for
parents to be
having lessons
and studying
reading
experimenting from
Anat's new book,
you know the one,
Kids Beyond Limits.

If you, the parent,
can feel how pleasant
and useful it is,
the feel
as sensation,
without any words in the way,
just FEEL a connection,
say from your hand back into your shoulder blade
and back even more into your spine,

If you can feel this
sense this,
know this in yourself,
you can begin to realize how powerful
and playfully useful you can be with
your child,
just "playing" with her hand.

This is love.
Attention to yourself,
just perfect as you are now.
Attention to your child,
just perfect as she or he is now.

A hand, a rib, a cheek,
a toe,
all these parts are so amazing
and connect with so many other parts,
and are so happy to be moved
gently and in a way
that makes them "wake" up to
possibilities of new and different actions.

And so,
there are no mistakes.
Your child moves this way,or that,
it doesn't really matter,
all motions  can have four or five variations.

The child moves a way someone else might call
a "mistake,"
and with enough variations,
some more useful options will show up,
and if they really work for the child,
he or she will pick them.
With no scolding, repremanding,
being told to "stop that,"
or "do it this way."

If it's a game
and a better way is practiced,
the better way WILL be adopted.

We are always at that crossroads
of sleeping through our life,
doing what we've always done,
and waking up the the intense magic
and possibility of NOW>

And still,  habit says:
do what you always did.

Learning is always whispering (or more):
I wonder what this change would be like.

Play with the changes,
in you
and in your child
and in your movement with your child.

You'll have a lot of fun.
It will feel like love,
because it will be love.

And the changes will come,
at just the speed they are supposed to come.

ciao
for
NOW,
Chris

Love's possible pathways: happy new year

If you look at the world around you,
here is what you see:
some nature,
more if you are lucky,
less if the city is your place

you see a lot of buildings
and roads
and that too,
more or less

and then there are people
everywhere people

and sometimes you are lucky
and someone comes along and you share
some nights and days with
you love them
or at least want to be with them

sometimes children
come from this

sometimes
not

and sometimes this "relationship,"
as it's called gets better and better

you are fascinated
the other person is fascinated

you are learning and growing
they are learning and growing

you are on the spot present to them
listening
and hearing what their words say
and what the heart underneath the words
is saying



and they listen,
really listen too

and you laugh
and discover,
my oh my,
you each have quirks and eccentricities
and you find that charming

and sometimes one or the other
will be less than totally thoughtful
and that can be interesting to explore

and you get bored sometimes
and go off and read a good book
or write one
or meditate

there is no rush to be always
together
and
a great delight when you are

.....
this happens sometimes

.......

i hope this is happening to you
right now
this year

and in the meantime:

if no one is around who is a great listener,
get out a friendly journal
and start listening to yourself

if no one is around to laugh and indulge you
when you are less than perfect
my
this is a good habit to develop

and when you want to romp with others,
and don't have a special other,
find a dance group,
find a group hike,
find a sing along crowd
find a reading group

there are people everywhere
some are lonely
and just waiting for a friendly
person
to say hello
how was your day

the world is full
of possibilities

enjoy

January 6. 2012
a very good year

Special vs Holy Relationship: Course of Miracles via Marianne Williamson

This quote is in the relationships section
comparing
(recall all the power of the idea
of learning as the increased perception of differences)
"unholy relationship"
and a holy one:

"For an unholy relationship is based of
differences,
where each thinks the other has what
they have not.
They come together, each to rob the other.
They stay until they think that there is nothing
left
to steal, and then
move on.
And so they wander through a world of
strangers,
unlike themselves [actually like themselves, in their weird
pseudo isolation, but thinking everyone is unlike]
living in their bodies perhaps under a common
roof
that shelter neither;
in the same room and yet a world apart.

A holy relationship
starts from a different promise.
EAch one has looked within
and seen no lack.
Accepting their own completion, each would extend
it by
joining
with the other, whole as themselves."

And holy wholey as two/ one.

This is from Marianne Williamson's
A Return to Love.

The quote is from the Course on Miracles
and then she goes on to increase clarity
on this distinction.

Of the wanting to get
vs wanting to share variety:

other has to shape up
vs other is grand

other should "behave" according to our program
vs other should shake us up a little or lot and get us
to expand loving

and so on

Get it and read yourself.

This is a nice quote of hers, though:

"Our ego is merely our fear.
We all have egos, that doesn't make us bad people.
Our egos are not where we are bad,
but where we are wounded."

The Happiness option

You know and
I know
we can at any moment
"chose happiness."

And it's a bunch of fun to let happiness
emerge as
"Who we really are,"
not by "trying" to be happy,
nor by the Pursuit of Happiness,
famous words we've heard someone,
and a sucker's game for a consumerist society, really,

nah, just happy because we run out of
steam in our games that avoid happiness

Like the
"You are wrong game."

play that and be happy.
lots of luck eh.

righteousness feels so good for the first half
second
and then, whether we know it our not,
it's just disguised hatred,
and that poison plays away inside

oh, no,
does that mean we can't be right and happy
at the same time?

No. we can be right about the bird we
see
the sky we watch
the breath we follow
even be right about the yukky sensations we
feel when righteous

but right that another is wrong,
or even better,
right that another should be different
because they could be "factually wrong,"
or behaviorally challenged (always according
to our rules and expectations of how we want
to be treated like kings and queens, and they somehow
just don't
"get it")
and how far do we get being right that they are wrong about
how they proceed in the world

ah, this is either obvious or
not

doesn't matter

I've discovered that the Work of Byron Katie
can greatly be assisted by switching positions:

sit here and believe the story is true
sit here and think it's an opinion
(this is Questions 1 and 2 in a way)

sit here and look at the other person knowing with
sweet righteous conviction: They should be different

How do you react in that seat.

Move to the "my thought is an opinion" chair.
look at them without the thought, empty mind,
just see the present reality
and
ta da...
what's left
who are you?

happiness is probably part of what's left
when the not you of judging falls away

don't believe this
or preach this

try it out

or not

your business
your life
your happiness

nourish your happiness and it will nourish you
and those around
you
and the Earth

be of good Cheer
on this muggy in Austin friday
with Austin City Limits music blasting to me
from several miles away,

good
Chris

Loving What is

Shorty but goody, for special needs parents, and....all of us

This is going to be short.

Find anything
your child is learning,
or enjoys
or does well
or does slightly better than betfor
or is happy about

and be enthusiastic about that

And realize what a miracle a human
body is
and
get enthusiastic about taking lessons yourself.

You know all the reasons.

And if you only know the tiniest smallest littlest
reason,
get enthusiastic about that.

Good.

Thumb and little finger, games for you, and maybe food for the brain of a child

Last week the toes, 
this week the fingers.

And what is the biggest different we can
find
in the fingers.

Between the big strong and ever useful thumb,
and the little weak, and often forgotten pinkie
is a great place to start
(though in reality the ring finger is the least recognized
in the brain, but that's okay,
let's make the differences as far away as possible:
big finger = thumb
littlest finger = pinkie.

Now, this gets tricky with a special needs child,
because we can play with these fingers and the
child might not be able to distinguish
the differences.

So what to do?
As always start with yourself:

start with whatever hand is connected to the  shoulder and elbow
that feels best.

Let your hand be wide.

Splay out your thumb and little finger as far away from each
other as they can comfortably go,
and then paying attention to them both,
begin to rotate and gyrate your hand
in many places and positions.

Roll in around, way out there,
up high, over the the side, down between your legs,
behind your back.

Bring it close and rotate the hand up and down your front side
feeling the differences in the thumb touching your body and the
little finger doing the same, and feel/ sense all the while,
the relationship in space and in sensation of the two fingers.

Take lots of rests.

Have some fun.

Take a walk to rest, or lie down.

Then do everything you did above
with realization of the elbow
and the shoulder blade
and the ribs
and the spine
and the pelvis.

Think of different ways to circle your head
with the pair of fingers, the little finger and the thumb,
all the while keep attention and awareness
on and open to your spine and ribs and pelvis.

Take lots of rests.

Would this to be good for your child.

In little doses, sure.

Keep it small.

Don't force their hand,
and I have never said that literally,
it's kind of neat:
don't force their hand.

And touch their spine or ribs now and then
as you do this.

If you don't force anything,
and don't expect yourself to have had the
years of training a practitioner has,
and just let it be joyful,
something will happen.

You will have some experience.
Your child will have some experience.

If you are non judgment,
and not forcing,
they will learn.

You might not know what.

That doesn't matter.

Go slow,
gentle
curious.
Enjoy the touch.

First take: My New Process, The Joy of Divorce, From Broken to Breakthrough

I am deepening and broadening my work.

I will be including the Anat Baniel / Feldenkrais method
of working in
groups and privately with people to upgrade their nervous systems
to undo pain,
transcend limitations,
become more young, free and intelligent in their bodies







AND

the work of Byron Katie



to transform
pain, hurt, anger, resentment and confusion
into
peace, freedom, joy, love and happiness










AND

the "not really work"
more the life path
of Being Present

to help us all recall the everypresent
present
as a way out of suffering
and
into pleasure, creativity, potency, and lifelong vitality

AND

some work/ play/ discovery I've taken
from Gestalt Therapy
and refined to make a marvellous path
to taking the juice away
from both our Inner Critic
and our Inner Victim
and bringing it back
to the calm, happy, smart and loving Real Self
who is us
without the baggage

AND

Conscious Communication
patterned on Speaking Circles,
with the goal and pleasure
of real talking
real listening
being present in both ends of the conversation
and the delight of all that

So, I'll say more on this here tomorrow,
but I wanted to get started

Slowing down while moving ahead

happiness is two paintings 

made by yourself 

decorating your own wall

and with two "bites" out of one 

for self made cards to friends

This is what I'm interested in my life now:
being present and in the world.

Successfully in the world.
Even outrageously successful in the world.

All at no cost to the ongoing joy bliss and power of being present.

.....

I'm creating a program that combines Anat Baniel/ Feldenkrais work
with the work of Byron Katie
with Voice Dialogue work
with Gestalt
with straight ahead being present
with meditation
with Real Health
with Lavish and Ecological Abundance

I wish to move forward, have fun,
be successful, help a huge number of people
radically improve their connections to

each other
the present
themselves
their idea of God. spirit. oneness.

which means that along the way,
my joy and goal is to be connected to

others
the present
myself
God

this is ambitious and fun

And what of the slowing down in the title of this essay?

Slowing down any time I'm not feeling and sensing myself in a pleasant
and potent place

Why:
because without slow
I can't learn
and without learning I have to keep doing
what I've been programmed to do

This is fun:
Pain = slow down
slow down = chance to learn
learning = chance to change
change could be::::: pain away
and happy potent rich life instead

it's as if slowing and learning and awaring are food,
food for the deepest sweetest part of ourselves

Good.

Special Needs Children and Learning Challenges

Update from a posting of October 17, 2006:

Sometimes children need help in their learning.

They may have been born with a neurological issue,
such as cerebral palsy or a stroke, or brachial plexus.
There can be complications in utero or at birth.
Hospital procedures can go awry.
All sorts of traumas can occur.

For these neurological issues,
as well as children with "ordinary" learning challenges
(as in reading and math and social adjustment and co-ordination)
the FELDENKRAIS METHOD,
(invented by Israeli physicist, judo master and child development expert, Moshe Feldenkrais, 1904-1984)
and even more especially the method as refined
in the Anat Baniel Method for Children,
(see Overview, Anat Baniel Method for Children)
is the supreme way on this Earth of helping these children.

This is because in these methods,
we recreate the natural pathways of learning
and wake up the brain to its possibilities of
change and learning and improvement
in a way that no amount of physical therapy or surgery ever can do.

Think of a child learning to crawl.
She or he sees no one crawling,
gets no crawling lessons,
isn't pressured to learn,
doesn't even think about learning to crawl.
He or she just moves this way and that
and learns hundreds of ways to understand
and move
and sense
and coordinate themselves.

A huge amount of learning
involves pushing down
and raising this and that
part of themselves against
the ongoing pull of
GRAVITY.

And then one day,
wanting to get across the room
or yard
easier,
the child "miraculously" pulls together the twenty things
they need
and crawl.

This is organic learning.

This is learning based on function.

This is learning where the brain, the body,
discovery, intention, and action all
merge to create an
upgraded human being.

This is why this method is so amazingly effective.


For a summary
and continued explanation
see Amazing One on One Lessons

You might be excited to
experience the amazing videos
of ANAT BANIEL
working with three children.
Watching the progress of these
three children over a period of time
you can see the almost miraculous changes.
Try this:

Grace, Isabel and Carter Transform and Heal.

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This work, for a child with learning difficulties,
is the fresh drink they have been desperate for all their lives.
They are not pushed, or prodded, or force to "do it right."
They are not "fixed," or moved in ungentle ways.

They are given small pieces of real and immediately felt learning
(inner and organic "learning,"
not the imposed kind that gives "learning" a bad sound to many children, and adults)
and they begin to renew and change almost before our eyes.

For lessons,
rates,
a free initial phone consultation,
contact
Chris Elms
at 707-721-6835

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