Last Chapter: Principle 8--Save the world , in a happy, sexy, awake way

Principle #8: Save the World

Make a Huge Difference

While staying happy and sexy and learning and growing and delighting in every moment of the way.

The world is a mess.

Turn on the TV. Look at the papers.

Notice all the recent natural disasters brought about by climate change.

Witness the government officials ignorant of this.

Witness the poverty and racism and wars raging. 

Witness all the latest messes.

People are having a hard time being kind and fair and loving to each other.

The world is having a hard time being kind and fair to all its humans.

We as a species might as well be considered at war with Nature, which seems a bit crazy, since we ultimately spring from nature.

A mess.

A mess.

And what are we going to do?

Save the World Game #1

Think of one area you’d like to make a difference

Do any small step toward that today.

This is silly, and we often just plain believe the story we tell ourselves: “No time.”

And we can trust our email to bring us, almost instantly, an opportunity.

I rarely look at my email, and needed a break from a couple hours of writing.

So I opened it.

Move.On had an inspiring and wonderful video about the successes of progressive and good hearted people this year, and the work still to be done. They had a box to click to donate.

So I did.

Not much, and as it was part of hundreds of thousands of others, I do hope and believe that will be part of the world I’m trying to be a happy revolutionary in.

And, it’s time to bid you adieu.

We’ll play three more games and then you are off on the adventure of a lifetime.

Have more sex.

Be awake in the present.

Get healthier. (next book, raw plus smart eating plus love lust and enlightenment)

Stay horny.

Be happy.

Save the world.

How?

Love and Save the World Game #1:

What do you love?

How can you help more people experience that?

Talk, in four minute turns, about this

With your mate, with a friend, with a stranger.

This is about connecting.

And exploring.

The world is a mess.

Those who have “the answers” often make things worse. 

Those willing to listen and explore, often make things better.

Have fun.

Lust and Save the World Game #1

Have the clitoris stroking sex at least once a day.

Have some other kind of sex at least once a day, preferably in the early am.

When you rest, or fall back to sleep after this, feel:

Gratitude

and wonder:

What can I/ we do to create a more wonderful world for everyone.

See what happens if you explore from the state of connection and bliss.

This seems ridiculous in a way.

Good.

Silliness is next to godliness.

And this isn’t even silly.

It’s honoring the miracle of sexual pleasure with which God/ Nature/ the Universe made humans.

Go ahead.

You can expand this way.

Enlightenment and Saving the World Game #1

Meditate every day.

For 10-30 minutes.

Go into the awareness that is aware.

AWARE your thinking but doesn’t believe your thinking (or disbelieve, but just is aware of) 

AWARE of your feelings, but doesn’t believe your feelings (or disbelief, but just is aware of)

AWARE of your sensations, but doesn’t think they are a big deal, nor believe they are nothing. They are your body, right now.

No body = nobody. 

If you aren’t home to your body, you aren’t home to you.

And the key is

Smile and be AWARE

From here, either come out with an idea of how to create more good in the world.

Or come out refreshed

Or come out frustrated from having spent the time believing instead of awaring.

This is life.

Write for five minutes after meditation.

Don’t think about what you are going to write in meditation.

See what comes to you.

Good.

That’s it.

Time to do one or two or any of the games.

I’m going to go meditate for ten minutes and write for five.

Then take a walk and sense my arms and legs and love nature.

What are you going to do?

LIFE IN THE NOW. What shifts?

Enlightenment Challenge #1:

If we are alive, right now, 

HOW 

to make this more real and vivid.

NOW

This is either easy or hard.

It’s easy if you “just do it.”

It’s hard if you think you are wasting time, by slowing down your attention to actually be present.

And in a way… this is THE most important thing a human being can do.

Shift to the present.

Not later.

Right now.

Really ….RIGHT NOW.

THIS MOMENT COUNTS.

THIS IS NOT A REHEARSAL. 

THIS BOOK IS NOT ABOUT “WAKING UP” LATER.

The delight of being present is that you never have to “wait around” for any other conditions.

You don’t need a being present uniform.

You don’t need to go to a being present gym.

You don’t need to be in a being present mood.

You don’t need being present health.

Or being present amounts of money.

There is an admission charge, and it is not money. It’s attention.

Believe me, or not, but discover for yourself: there is something in you, somewhat like a robot, that very much wants you to stay asleep to the present moment.

And this is the challenge for you: wake to the present and feel yourself as you really are. Alive.

Let’s have three layers to the Enlightenment Challenge

Layer One:

Feel yourself alive by noticing;

BREATHING

And by noticing 

GRAVITY

This alone can shift your life.

No breathing, no life. Noticing your breathing >>> knowing you are alive.

Right now, follow your breathing. This wonderful activity has been going on since you were born. We rarely notice it.

Notice your breathing.

What happens when you notice your breathing?

And notice gravity.

You are standing and your feet are pressing down into something.

You are laying down and your entire back, side or front is pressing into something.

Most likely…

You are sitting and your butt is pressing into a chair or bench or something.

Feel the pressure down.

Feel the pressure up.

Your feet are pressing into something. Most of gravity and you are interacting through your pelvis, but the feet have a small percentage. Feel it.

Now.

Feel the pressure down.

Feel the pressure up.

Unless we are in outer space, gravity, like air and breathing, is a constant of our life on Earth. A constant since the day we left the balancing waters of the womb and came out into the world of up and down. 

Feel these two, as anchors into the NOW>>>>

BREATHING.

GRAVITY.

What shifts for you when you notice this?

Layer Two of the First Enlightenment Challenge.

Sense your entire right leg.

Sense your entire right arm.

Sense your entire left arm.

Sense your entire left leg.

Add in, all of your toes.

Add, in, all of your fingers.

This is a lot.

And this is our lot in life: we can move and we have legs to walk on and hands and arms to hug or build or eat food or write books or put on clothes, or take off clothes, or to garden, or create food, or paint, or sculpt, or make love.

Arms and fingers.

Legs and toes.

This is in addition to breathing.

See if, one limb at a time, you can breathe into:

Your right leg and toes.

Your right arm and fingers.

Your left arm and fingers.

Your left leg and toes.

Breathe and notice all your limbs and notice their connection to gravity.

If your legs are crossed, one will be pressing down against another.

One or two feet will be pressing into the floor or ground.

Your arms each have weight and will have their own connection to gravity.

This is a lot.

This is you, in the midst of the miracle:

Two arms and a bunch of fingers.

Two legs and a bunch of toes.

Gravity.

Breath.

What happens when you bring, RIGHT NOW, your attention into this presence of your body and your breathing and your connection to gravity.

Brief time out for the second radically important question:

What shifts for you, when you bring your attention to being present?

To repeat::::

What shifts, for you, when you bring your attention to being present?

We are alive.

Right now.

This is not true of our chair.

Of the buildings around us.

We can know we are alive.

Right now.

Maybe animals can.

Maybe plants can. We don’t know if they can shift into awareness of being alive.

We can. Humans can.

We can know the special human KNOWING OF BEING ALIVE, RIGHT NOW.

And something shifts when we “wake up” to that knowing.

My idea for you, perhaps even my gift for you, is this:

Don’t be present because it’s something you think/ believe you “should” do.

Be present because it creates a shift.

That you notice.

And you like.

So ask yourself often this central question to a real life :

WHAT SHIFTS WHEN I SHIFT INTO BEING PRESENT?

Touch in the Now, wow, no hurry, no worry, just "feel"

The book is once again, Love, Lust and Enlightenment
and it still wants you to have a marvelous relationship
and
a body brain teamwork that helps you feel younger and smarter and happy
each and every day.

Here's a chapter, day six.
It's going to be thirty day's worth of couple delight and anti-aging fun.

Day Six: Touch in the Now 

Life is now.

We know (as experience) that we are alive,  moment by moment—call that awake.

We are lost in our hurry or our inner chatter, and missing our experience in the moment --- call that asleep.

Someday we will die, and all these moments of having a chance to sense and know and feel ourselves as bodies and beings on this marvelous messy bright beautiful mysterious blue sky green lead infinite laughter flower and bird song planet Earth will be over.

Done.

Dead , finished, over.

One of the surest ways to know we are alive, and to be present is to follow our breathing.

Now. Try it. Notice your breathing and what does that do for you? Notice that difference. (Who notices that?)

Another constant of life on earth, is gravity. What do you feel now about your bottom pressing into the chair, or your feet into the floor?

What does noticing you are a real live body, in breathing and in gravity, what does that do for you?

(Who notices that?)

Breathing.

Gravity.

Always there. Always an immediate way to “wake up” to now.

BE IN AWARENESS OF NOW.

AWARENESS OF YOUR BREATHING.

AWARENESS OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP TO GRAVITY.

AWARENESS OF YOUR AWARENESS.

And from here, let’s touch today.

Try two turns of three minutes each of touching the other’s foot.

Go slowly.

And In the first turn, do what you did in prior touches. Take turns verbalizing what you are feeling as the toucher, and as the touchee.

So, go three minutes each each way with that.

Second turn:

Each time you verbalize what you are noticing, start with three verbalizations
One: about your breathing
Two: about what you notice about the other person’s breathing

Three: what you notice about your connection to gravity.

And then four and five:

What you notice either in your touching, or in being touched.

Take turns sharing these five statements.

Realize what a relief this can be, not to have to think. To simply be reporting on breath and gravity and touch.

Go back and forth this way several times.

At the end share for a couple of minutes, what it was like to be touched and to touch in the two different ways.

Even now, even in this sharing, you might want to walk of now as gravity, or now as breath, and then go back to sharing about your responses and inspirations and realizations in this “game.”

The Secret of Happiness

The Secret of Happiness

The secret of happiness is to stop DOING unhappiness.

We do unhappiness when we forget this:  When we argue with Reality we lose, but only 100% of the time.

Like this: look at a nearby chair.

Demand that it be an elephant.

Any luck.

Now pout, get angry, feel hurt that it’s not an elephant.

Any shift?

Okay. The chair is a chair. So be it.

Here’s four arguments with reality we always lose:

That we be different (in the past, or exactly this moment) than we are. Arguing with ourselves. Painful.

That others be different. They should instantly or in the past have been different.

That the world be different. We know how it should be.

That God be different. Arguing with the inevitable.

Examples:

Argument with myself: “I should be happy right now.”(If I’m not) I can shift in two seconds. But right now, I am what I am.

“I should have been happy yesterday.” Never going to happen.

Argument with Others: “You should be nicer.” You are the chair, exactly as nice or not nice as you are.

Again, in two seconds it can change, but “You should have been nicer yesterday.” Never going to happen.

Argument with the world. “There should be no poverty.” Not in this instant, at least.

Argument with God. “So and so shouldn’t have died.”

Who says.

“So and so should have lived longer.”

Is it true?

What Is has the sweet finality of being exactly what it is.

If we can love it, we can change a lot in the next two seconds or two days or two weeks.

If we fight it right now, pain.

If we fight what was yesterday, which is the source of almost all couple’s fights, pain, pain, pain.

Ready to be happy?

People think they are complaining because they are in hell.

Whoops, the other way around. People are in hell because they are complaining/ arguing with reality.

Okay, cool.

Do with this what you may.

Talk.

Take turns.

In gibberish, tell your partner some way they should change.

Switch to another chair. In English, say what you see right now. Only present based observation.

Go back and forth with this for awhile.

Share at the end how this was for you.

Touch:

Explore and rub the other person’s foot.

Switch between telling yourself you aren’t doing it right or that there is some “better” way to do this

And

Simply exploring exactly as you are. As if it’s brand new moment every moment.

Take four minute turns.

Share at the end how this was for you.

Be Lazy

Three Secrets to Cheating Unhappiness, Reversing Aging, Better Sex, and More Money
One: Be Lazy

Here’s the first secret: be lazy.

I know, I know, everyone wants you nose to the grindstone, and they have their nose there to distract from their unhappiness, and to hell with that. Less is more.

And I’ll start right off practicing what I preach, because you might think, Oh My God, 3 secrets times four categories: that’s 12 secrets. Who wants that much?

Not I.

Not you.

It’s three secrets, and they are, being lazy, and being present in your body, and “doing it wrong” or doing it non-habitually.

And further in keeping with being lazy. I’ll just write one a day. ( I do a chapter a day. One is enough. One is a lot. This whole book has been written, to this point by April 25, 2015. It started March 21, 2015. Less is more.)

There was a time awhile back when my son and I, on the phone, got in a tiff about something.

Who knows what?

The usual human bullshit which boils down to “I’m right and you’re wrong,”  “No, No, you have it backwards: I’m right and you’re wrong.”

And on and on.

So we got off the phone in mutually bad moods.

I got lazy about winning the argument. I called back, and said I didn’t care who was right. That our connection was what mattered, and to hell with whatever we were arguing about.

And so laziness in winning arguments with others, especially your mate or your kids, can make a big dent in cheating unhappiness.

Another place laziness is actually reality, when you think you have “too much to do.”

You probably do.

And a lot of unhappiness comes from trying to think about doing it all at once, or within a time frame.

Sometimes it’s good to write down the time frame so you don’t have to think about it.

But the lazy and sane thing to do, no matter what: do one small thing at a time, and figure out how to enjoy it.

Lazy means enjoying the roses along the way. Happiness means enjoying the roses along the way.

And reversing aging and laziness: Take a nap every two hours. Even two minutes in your chair, ten minutes on the floor, eight minutes on the lawn, twenty minutes on your bed.

Combine it with visualizing sweet clouds, or deepening your breath (secret 2: get into your body in the present). Combine it with sensing any part of yourself that needs relaxing.

You’ll live longer.

You’ll be nicer at the end of the day.

Lazy and sex.

Let’s make this short.

Don’t rush to the climax.

Savor.

Enjoy the pleasure exactly as it is.

Look at your partner.

Talk to your partner.

Keep communication and humor going.

Be happy.

Lazy and money.

Oh, my.

Here we are at the grindstone again, and , like jogging and bikhram yoga, ( and drinking) overwork is a well known way to stuff your unhappiness by numbing out to it.

And, you aren’t reading a book on Love, Lust and Enlightenment if you want to stuff your unhappiness on the way to making as wonderful an amount of money as you wish to make.

So, rather than go into it in any depth at all, I’ll be true again to my laziness and say what you already know: there is an easier and more enjoyable path to whatever you need or want to do it your work.

Find it.

Ah, ha.

Talk today:

2 minute turns:

Look at your partner.

Have a complaint in your head.

Feel how awful that feels in your body.

Look at their face and eyes and breathing.

Get too lazy to hold on to that thought.

Then talk only what you sense and notice in the present, or your appreciations of them.

At two minutes, pause. Breathe a bunch of times together and do this the other way around.

Go back and forth at least three times each way.

Touch:

Same theme:

2 foot massages of 2 minutes:

One, trying to “do it right.”

Two, being lazy, and having fun for you as well as them.

Go both ways.

Compare the difference in giving and getting.

mindfulness when you have "too much to do"

See my new website, if you'd like, it's underway,

but worth looking at if you wish: 

AutismRewired.com

there are a million excuses not to be present

and here's a good reason to be:

one day we'll be dead

and here's another,
and you can take the hint from this exercise,
the first I have couples do, when they are wishing
to upgrade their relationship

They take turns saying this:
"I am alive.
You are alive."

They do that three times, present to themselves and the other.

Then, three times with the kicker;

"Someday I'm going to die.
Someday you are going to die."


And that's the other half:
every person that you are judging, ignoring, punishing, dismissing, spacing out and not giving attention, cutting off on the freeway, deciding is stupid, wishing they weren't around

every one,
someday

dead


okay,
from there
how important is the "getting things done?"

how many of us want this on our
gravestone:

"Was always busy."

And so what?
You can be busy and present.
It's harder.
It's fun.

How?
Practice.

The King's Son ( and the Queen's Daughter);;;; journey of the soul

Once, in a country where all people were like kings and queens, there lived a family, who were in every way content, and whose surroundings were such that the human tongue cannot describe them in terms of anything that is known today.

This country of Sharq seemed satisfactory to the young prince Dhat and his sister princess Fatima.  Until one day, their parents told them: “Dearest children of ours, it is the necessary custom of our land, that each prince and princess go forth on a trial. This is to fit yourselves to be the king and queen you are meant to be.

This trial will enable you to achieve—by watchfulness and effort—an inner and outer strength impossible without it.

Thus it has been ordained in the beginning and thus it will always be. “

The Prince and Princess were prepared for the journey.

They were given a special food that would nourish them, which was of small compass but illimitable quantity.

They were given certain resources, which it is not possible to mention, to guard them, if properly used.

They had to travel to a certain country, Misr, and they had to go in disguise. They left behind their royal clothes, and took those of the new land. They were given guides for the journey and a sacred task: to bring back a certain jewels, guarded by a fearsome monster.

Their guides took them to the new land, to Misr, and left them there. They had been instructed to part, so they did, soon finding others who were on the same mission as companions.

But, because of the air and food of the country, all forgot their mission, and went into an ongoing sleep. This lasted many years, as Dhat and Fatima went about humble vocations, unaware of what had happened to them.

By means familiar to them but unknown to other people, the inhabitants of Sharq felt the situation of Dhat and Fatima, and sent them messages by a strange means, the inner content of which was:

“Awake. You are the daughter and son of kings and queens. You have a mission. It is time to stop your sleep.”

The message awoke the pair, who found each other at the monster’s lair, and by means of special sounds, they put the monster to sleep and retrieved the Jewels.

The Sounds now guided them back to Sharq, and almost at once they were again in their royal attire, and at one with their real home.

This time, though, through their experiences, they were able to see that what they had taken for granted was of far greater splendor than they could have imagined, and that it was the place commemorated vaguely by the people of Misr as Salamat, which the people of Misr took to be the word for Submission, but which Dhat and Fatima now realized, meant …. peace.

My rendition of the last teaching story, usually called the King’s Son,  in The Tales of the Dervishes by Idries Shah, from a dervish’s transcription of a recital supposed given by Amir Sultan, Sheik of Bokhara, who taught in Istanbul and died in 1429.

Waking Up

Tis a strange facet of life
this habit we most of us have
of walking and talking and working and
playing and resting and eating and
love making
and driving our cars
and
watching playing on using the
computer

we are asleep doing it

not the Zzzzz's in our bed,
but the going through the motions mechanically,
not knowing in the moment
about
our relationship to gravity
about air coming in and out
about light coming in
about our arms and legs
and spine
where are they,
what motion or shapes are they making.
and our lips
and our
ears:
what sounds are coming in?

that would be a full scheme of awakeness

and we don't have it

so....
we can always make an effort
and
then forget
and then remember that we forgot
and
make another effrt
and then
forget
and then remember we forgot and
smile
and sigh
and make another effort

and
so on yes

Practice --- day 2 of Sex Every Day

OM stands for orgasmic meditation.

You've heard the phrase, meditation practice.

OMing is a meditation practice. Sexy one. And not sexy in a way, because it's about being slow enough and awake enough to feel, as sensation, what is going on now.
and now

and now

and now

OM is a meditation practice.

Practice means you plug away and if you do well, great; if it's not so great, you keep plugging away.

How could you do it better?

And what is better in meditation?

Paying attention.

Being present.

For the strokee: being present to where the finger is stroking and to the sensation in her body.

For the stroker: being present to where the finger is stroking and to the sensation in his or her body.

This is  seeminglya slam dunk, right, it's such a pleasurable place.

And yet, for the strokee, the temptation is to feel it's all "too much" and to check out, or to want to pull for climax, and to get involved in the idea of "too much" and not the real sensations.Or to wish her stroker were a little more this, a little less that. Or to maybe wish she hadn't said yes to this OM. Or to think she's not "really doing it right."

And so on.

For the stroker, good god, so many thought pathways to go down: am I doing it right? Where is the clitoris? What's the right stroke? Why isn't she responding? And more and more . ( With the great relationship ruiner: if the other one were just more of this , or less of that. Why can't they get this or that together?)

And it's a practice: come back to the moment, as you come back to breathing or sensing or emptiness in a meditation.

AND HERE'S MAYBE THE MOST IMPORTANT: WHEN YOU COME BACK TO THE PRESENT, DON'T ATTACK YOURSELF FOR HAVING LEFT IT

JUST ENJOY "COMING HOME"

Practice doesn't make perfect.

It makes awake.

Or, more correctly: it's practice in coming back to awake again and again and again.

This is what life is for. To wake up.

Practicing with a partner in the world of orgasm is a sweet path to waking up.

Perhaps it's for you to try.

Every Day.

Sex Every Day.

And each day "it" will be different, and all you have to do, is be there, be aware.

Pay attention.

there is always too much to do

there is always too much to do
and there is always time
to
come back home
to nothing
to
no thing
to the only thing,
your life,
our life,
the miracle of Life,
right now

never wrong
right
now

sounds so silly
and it makes
sense
yourself in this moment

they won't last forever
or will they?

let's find out
one
moment
at a
time

which time

the one that disappeared just now
into....
now

Mindful, thanks for life, Mary Oliver poem

Mindful
by Mary Oliver
Every day
I see or hear
something
that more or less
kills me
with delight,
that leaves me
like a needle
in the haystack
of light.
It was what I was born for--
to look, to listen,
to lose myself
inside this soft world--
to instruct myself
over and over
in joy,
and acclamation.
Nor am I talking
about the exceptional,
the fearful, the dreadful,
the very extravagant--
but of the ordinary,
the common, the very drab,
the daily presentations.
Oh, good scholar,
I say to myself,
how can you help
but grow wise
with such teachings
as these--
the untrimmable light
of the world,
the ocean's shine,
the prayers that are made
out of grass?

the being alive thing

what is the key to a good life?

perhaps this:
realizing you are going to die,
and hence,
you are alive,
and hence,
can be experiencing one and only one
moment:

now

Breathing with the power belly: independence, joy, discovery, love, life, mindfulness day 4

 

July 4, 2012

Independence Day:

People who work with breathing and who work with “bodies”
have lots of rules:
breathe this way
move that way
this is the correct posture
no strain no gain

And this isn’t mindfulness
the full

Mind in what we do

let’s breathe again today,
more or less the “opposite” of yesterday
and let’s add on the pelvis and head as the

“Middle Line”
of a

five line being we are connecting with
as a daily and ongoing meditation:

Two arm lines

two leg lines

the pelvis spine head line

And breathing (is there more?
sure,
we’ve got 27 more days to fill with
more and more

de

lightful

mind

ful

ness)

So, sit comfortably

Way at the front of the chair

(as my qigong guy says: So your genitals
are hanging off into the air,

Or as I’d say: so your pelvis is on the chair
and your legs are off)

put both hands on your forehead

Elbows pointed forward

First yesterday’s breathing:

Bend down, round your back,
bring your elbows toward your belly
let your belly go back and in
as you breathe out
and squeeze the air out

Add on pelvis awareness
and rock back on your pelvis as you round down

Feel your chest sinking,

Feel your head and pelvis moving “as if”
towards each other

Feel the whole pelvis head spine line

And

And

And

Keep awareness in both arms and both legs

now, after the air is out and your are as
curled up as you are going to be,
push your belly forward

Breathe in

Rock forward on your pelvis,
Lift your head, connected to your arms
towards the sky
and feel the pelvis spine head line
and two arms and two legs
and

Breathing in

Do this happily a number of times.

Now rest

Now, put the hands again on your forehead
again elbows forward

And bend down, elbows toward belly,
pelvis spine head all a unit,
and SUCK IN AIR

This is going to be “different”

Hell yeah

Good!

Belly squeezed way in

And

Suck in

Air

To your lungs

To your lower back

Suck

Suck

As you curl up

(again two arms, two legs,
this is life

Life is big)

At the bottom pause,

And as you push your belly forward

THRUST  (gently) your pelvis so your butt
rocks back and the top near your belly moves forward

As you move forward a bit on the chair

And PUSH the AIR OUT

ARCHING breathing out lifting your spine long and

Full in this

Curve

Then, come back down and in and curling up

Folding in

SUCKING THE AIR IN

AS YOUR BELLY PUSHES SMALL

Get small and round and full of air

In your back and lungs,

And then push the air out

Thrust your belly forward

Let your hands and arms and back and pelvis

All lift your gaze towards the sky

Many times

Rest

And then play with three of each

Type of breathing

No right way:

One, in my opinion,

“relaxes”

The other, again, my opinion,

Is a power stroke,

As if with a martial arts thrust

You feel and sense and notice what they are

Like to

You

Good