Monday, October 03, 2011

learning vs pushing someone/ the child to do what the person/ the child doesn't know how to do




This is a distinction (the title is:
learning vs pushing someone/ the child to do what the person/ the child doesn't know how to do)

Distinctions
Differences
Getting clear in thinking
Increasing complexity
Understanding subtleties int the world

It's a big wonderful game.
Called learning.
Called being human.

Notice that: it's how we learn:
perceiving differences

It's how the children learn:
any difference
big toe and little
big toe and thumb
arm going forward with the belly in
arm going forward with the belly out

it's all part of getting smarter and smarter
and more able to move
in ways the child intentionally chooses to move

And so the title:
learning vs being demanded / shown to do what you can't do

And it's obviously not a great strategy,
being demanded to do what you can't do,
and so much of traditional "teaching" and "therapy"
is that:
someone has a stroke; stand 'em up and start them walking again
never mind teaching the connection of arm to shoulder, of foot to pelvis,
of back to head,
just: hey, you need to walk, get walking


and again and again with the kids in traditional therapies:
you are "supposed" to sit by now,
so let's crank you into a sitting position

arms don't cross the midline,
hey,
let's crank 'em across

The sadness of all this
is forgetting how fun and amazing learning is
and
anything can be broken down into little enough
pieces so that someone can learn it.

Even us.
Working with kids.
Parents to kids.
If there is some help or teaching we "can't quite do"
YET
it's  a chance to slow down and find
a small piece we CAN do,
and Can at least experiment with doing

This being present thing.
And the trying different possibilities thing.
And observing the results from what we tried.
And being honest and backing off
and trying something else just to see if there's
a better way.

This could all make for a good life for us "adults"
and certainly for our
relationships.

Okay. That's our game this week:
think about when we demand of ourselves
or any of our children that we or they instantly
do what they or we don't know how to do yet,
instead of giving ourselves the pleasure and thrill of
discovering for ourselves:
how can this be learned.

Ciao
and happy cooler weather
if you are in Texas,
and around the country
it looks like rain and real fall are coming along.

Good.
Chris

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