Three Secrets to Cheating Unhappiness, Reversing Aging, Better
Sex, and More Money
One: Be Lazy
One: Be Lazy
Here’s the first secret: be lazy.
I know, I know, everyone wants you nose to the grindstone, and
they have their nose there to distract from their unhappiness, and to hell with
that. Less is more.
And I’ll start right off practicing what I preach, because you
might think, Oh My God, 3 secrets times four categories: that’s 12 secrets. Who
wants that much?
Not I.
Not you.
It’s three secrets, and they are, being lazy, and being present
in your body, and “doing it wrong” or doing it non-habitually.
And further in keeping with being lazy. I’ll just write one a
day. ( I do a chapter a day. One is enough. One is a lot. This whole book has
been written, to this point by April 25, 2015. It started March 21, 2015. Less
is more.)
There was a time awhile back when my son and I, on the phone,
got in a tiff about something.
Who knows what?
The usual human bullshit which boils down to “I’m right and
you’re wrong,” “No, No, you have
it backwards: I’m right and you’re wrong.”
And on and on.
So we got off the phone in mutually bad moods.
I got lazy about winning the argument. I called back, and said I
didn’t care who was right. That our connection was what mattered, and to hell
with whatever we were arguing about.
And so laziness in winning arguments with others, especially
your mate or your kids, can make a big dent in cheating unhappiness.
Another place laziness is actually reality, when you think you
have “too much to do.”
You probably do.
And a lot of unhappiness comes from trying to think about doing
it all at once, or within a time frame.
Sometimes it’s good to write down the time frame so you don’t
have to think about it.
But the lazy and sane thing to do, no matter what: do one small
thing at a time, and figure out how to enjoy it.
Lazy means enjoying the roses along the way. Happiness means
enjoying the roses along the way.
And reversing aging and laziness: Take a nap every two hours.
Even two minutes in your chair, ten minutes on the floor, eight minutes on the
lawn, twenty minutes on your bed.
Combine it with visualizing sweet clouds, or deepening your
breath (secret 2: get into your body in the present). Combine it with sensing
any part of yourself that needs relaxing.
You’ll live longer.
You’ll be nicer at the end of the day.
Lazy and sex.
Let’s make this short.
Don’t rush to the climax.
Savor.
Enjoy the pleasure exactly as it is.
Look at your partner.
Talk to your partner.
Keep communication and humor going.
Be happy.
Lazy and money.
Oh, my.
Here we are at the grindstone again, and , like jogging and
bikhram yoga, ( and drinking) overwork is a well known way to stuff your
unhappiness by numbing out to it.
And, you aren’t reading a book on Love, Lust and Enlightenment
if you want to stuff your unhappiness on the way to making as wonderful an amount
of money as you wish to make.
So, rather than go into it in any depth at all, I’ll be true
again to my laziness and say what you already know: there is an easier and more
enjoyable path to whatever you need or want to do it your work.
Find it.
Ah, ha.
Talk today:
2 minute turns:
Look at your partner.
Have a complaint in your head.
Feel how awful that feels in your body.
Look at their face and eyes and breathing.
Get too lazy to hold on to that thought.
Then talk only what you sense and notice in the present, or
your appreciations of them.
At two minutes, pause. Breathe a bunch of times together and do
this the other way around.
Go back and forth at least three times each way.
Touch:
Same theme:
2 foot massages of 2 minutes:
One, trying to “do it right.”
Two, being lazy, and having fun for you as well as them.
Go both ways.
Compare the difference in giving and getting.
