Love and Meditation

last day, supposedly,
of the mindfulness post/ poem
derby

sigh,
I've kind a gotten "into" it

and today:
try some
stop
sit
close eyes
sense your arms and legs
and spine
and (even, if you want) genitals
and breathing

and hang out
there,
not believing thoughts,
nor working with any effort
to keep them abay

and then
go about your day:
looking out
as you sense in

and love,
if you can
when you can
as best you can
how you can,
everything

everything you see outside

everything you sense
inside

that's a whiz bang
end

or not?

who cares

love the light
coming into your eyes
even now
at the half life
we live in
front
of our computers

love
Chris

An Anat Baniel story: the importance of mistakes, for us and for special needs children

In Anat's book, Kids Beyond Limits,
she is quite direct:
"Don't correct mistakes."

Use them as a stepping stone for variation.
Then learning to do and experience life as richer
occurs,
instead of experiencing.  "Oh, oh. I'm wrong again."

Here's a story:

Cello player, one of best in world,
comes to Anat with pain.

She asks him to play something simple.
After humfing and hawing, he decides
he can play something simple,
which he does, exquisitely, of course.

Now Anat asks him to play it poorly.
"Me. I can't play poorly. Blah, blah."

Anat: Do you have a student who plays poorly.

Cellist: Yes.

Anat: Can you play like them?

Cellist: Yes

So , he does.

And then Anat has him repeat.
And he's reluctant again, but not quite as much.

And again, and he's getting "into it."

And a couple of more, "poor" vatiations.

Good: his pain is gone.

Cool, eh?

My theory: he was so stuck at 98% perfect, he
couldn't feel and try anything else.

By variation on "poorly" he discovered some hiden
possibilities and was freed.

Good advice to us all,
as we strain and ruin ourselves to be more than we possibly
can be.

And for the children:
even a "less good" variation,
is good.

Way good.

experiencing the all of it up and down of it, now of it, yet

the times of day:
the day changes
and we use up energy

and can we be aware
of how we either "like"
or "don't like"

our state of energy throughout the day

and if we don't "like" what we are
aware of in our present expereince,

can we come back to "just" experiencing
the experience without a judgment

can we live
without our inner comment on
"how are we doing now"

(compared to what?
is always the good question,

or yesterday's question:
Who and what are we, without our story?

As the day shifts
and our energy shifts
can we keep
"just"
loving what is?



Good.

Day 29: Sunday: Laziness is next to Godliness

I had a friend once who said that:
"Laziness is next to Godliness."

And you know
and I know
what he meant:
do a little or a lot less,
less effort,
less do-ing
more be-ing

especially on Sunday,
what with even God resting,
at least in the Bible

though maybe She went surfing
or played golf as her rest

who knows?

and for you and me today,
let's play in the fields of easy:

let's do the simple things:
nap
and read
and less computer
(almost none, or all ways none)

and sensing the breathing
and the gravity on our bones

and that's enough

laziness without awareness is
fine
if the mind is empty

and if it's up to its usual chatter
look for the silence behind the chatter

and do a little less
a lot less
and sense the breahing
your breathing
and sense gravity

and
oh yeah,
one more "little thing"
remember that you are alive:

Good.

The end of suffering, if we want: Question #4: Without story, what's left?

if we have shit in our head

and it's usually about how
someone should be different,
or how we should be different,

and we've done the first three quesions
(see yesterday's "poem")

then this is left:
#4: Who or what would we be without the thought?

Simple.
"Just" be the who or what we are,
with no thought in our head.

Hmmmmm

A little difficult.
Well, well,
well: on the way, try
#4 minor: Who or what would we be if we didn't believe the thought?

And most bestest sweetest finest:
see how many seconds
we can have no thoughts

what happens to our suffering?

Don't have an answer:
have an experience

good

The attachment game viewed closely: Question #3 from Byron Katie

Ah, life, ah, habit:

this happens doesn't it?
something doesn't "go our way"
we tell ourselves that it
"should have"

we feel bad

and then,
weirdly, we tell ourselves that again,
and we still feel bad

and then we tell ourselves that
again
and
low and behold (whatever that means)
we feel bad as before

And here's a game,
when we feel bad,
Ask the first two questions
of the thought behind our feeling bad
(#1: Is it true,
#2, Can I absolutely know that this is true?)

And then ask ourselves:
#3: How do I react when I attach to that thought?
I.e. how do I feel, as emotion,
how do I feel, in my body as sensation,
how do I live: what do I avoid, what do I do/do/do
whom do I treat not so well

the consequences
as they are
line them up
write them down

take clarity in seeing:

Thought in/
attachment applied/
results


Another word for attaching to the thought
could be believing it

this is the start of freedom,
perhaps

and to goose up things a little,
and get a jump on Question #4 tomorrow

after lining up the misery ducks
from attaching to the thought

take the 5 second
NO THOUGHT IN THE BEANO
VACATION
that Adyashanti mentions
as the quick and easy way
to discover
who you really are

Good.

Day 26< Left/ left and left right/ and an Adyashanti game

This is a nice "warm up for the day" and
"take a break and get less creaky"
game

Stand
Put your weight on one foot or the other,
let's say the left

Now, with your weight there,
reach toward the ground,
bending legs all you want,
with your left hand,

and keeping your weight on the left side,
reach for the sky,

now,
still weight left,
reach down with the right hand
and up with the right hand

then switch,
weight right
and one time down and up left hand
one time down and up right hand

various rotating and breathing patterns
can be played with

and what of the mindfulness game of the day?

try combos of left leg/ left arm
left leg/ right arm
right leg/ left arm
right leg / right arm

as you are doing various things today

and
oh, yeah,
from Adyashanti's talk last night
(play at Adyashanti.org, if you'd like):
Stop thinking for 5 seconds
and see what you lose
and what remains as the real you.

Fun.

Day 25: Asking the story: are you absolutely true?

the story---- the story----the story
ah
watch, watch,
learn once
learn twice
learn forever and ever...
ah
this happens to us in our ruining our birthright of
happiness....
ah
all unhappiness has a
"story"
a game plan of mental
"reasons"
why you have a "right"
to feel bad

watch
live in the moment

and when unhappiness steals
you away
from the easy always just now NOW
ask,
ask two questions of the story:

#1: Is it true?
#2: Can I absolutely know that it's true?

Do that all day,
on and off, off and on,
and
only when you are unhappy

Good

Day 24: The Work starts: Is it true?

suffering  call to us
sometimes,
the crazy whisper/ yammer/ chatter/ taunt/ shout
of our mind,
nothing better to do
than
complain about others,
complain about us,
complain about our complain,

our mind, foolish patterned slave:
telling us the world is wrong

and that's today's game
today's "job"
(some of the best work
ever):
start the Work,
( you know: thework.com)

an inquire of the mind
with the mind

since behind each unhappiness
is a thought,
notice that thought
and ask the question:
Is it true?

That's all,
one two three:

feel unhappy/ suffering
notice the thought behind the feeling
ask the question, #1 in the work of Byron Katie:
Is it true?

"Just" ask


good

A Moshe story, about little differences, adding up

From my special needs children's blog, an entry, almost every Monday, see index at INDEX FOR SPECIAL NEEDS CHILDREN BLOG

Moshe Feldenkrais once got wupped in an arm wrestling duel
He challenged his tower opponent to a rematch in a couple of months
(don't have the facts on time, let's say a couple of months)

He went home and swung a hammer back and forth
as if arm wrestling on his first day of practice.
A nice light hammer.

The next day,
he wrapped a piece of copper wire near the head of the hammer
and swung it back and forth

So small a difference he's brain didn't register,
but his body had to do something slightly different

Each day
one more piece of wire

slowly
slowly

and then:
by two months (or whatever the "real " amount of
time was), the hammer was massive and no
changes had been bothersome,
or even notice-able day by day

and he won the rematch


And,
in our lives,
and with our children
all our children
how can we do something small
and amazingly slightly better
more clear
more aware
more...happy

who knows
what little difference might add up
and up
and up?

23 : Ten fingers, ten toes, belly....

Ten fingers Ten toes
Belly
Eyes
Ears
Nose


the belly and the nose:
breathing

the belly and the nose:
the spine and the head and the pelvis

eyes: light

ears: sound outside our head

fingers,
toes,
and the whole limb if we can

have fun

even now

ten fingers
ten toes
belly
eyes
ears
nose


good

day 22: what's the difference?

Following our breathing is soothing
and brings us back to ourselves

that's the words
that's the theory:
and for you
and me
in the present, today:
when we shift from not following our breathing
to following our breathing:
what happens?
emotionally?
physically?
spiritually?

And take a couple of more shifts
to watch and enjoy and learn from today.

Looking and knowing we are looking

Having a feeling and believing the story
having a feeling and "just" having it
having a feeling and deeply experiencing it (with story/ without the story)

having a thought and believing it
having a thought and not believing it

having a thought and "it having us"
having a thought and knowing we are having a thought
having a thought and being in gravity and breath, too

not knowing we are in gravity
knowing we are gravity

you can come up with more

pick a couple
and enjoy the difference

waking up isn't for "being good"
or "gooder"
or "goodest"

it's to end suffering

see what happens to suffering when
you shift to awareness


Good

Day 21: Suffering and separate; or, at one with our experience

Suffering and separate; or, at one with our experience
that's the choice:
Suffering and separate; or, at one with our experience

that's the mindfulness game today:
trace any and all suffering back
to some "war" with reality

some conflict where our thoughts
and feelings are sure that they are "right"
and reality is "Wrong."

Ah, the "wrong" game.
Making ourselves wrong, making others wrong,
making our past wrong, making our health wrong,
making others' behavior wrong

ah, so long we have played the "you are wrong" game
and today:

feel the effect.
soon, we'll run this through the work of Byron Katie,
but for now,
"just"
trace suffering back to a demand that
we be in conflict with reality

And, just to have some nice reading, here's what I woke up early,
and turned the book to in
Adyashanti's wonderful, all inclusive book:
Falling into Grace
(If want to purchase,
here's one way:


Here's the quote:
"One of the curious reasons why ego always
brings us back to suffering,
is that our ego has to be in some
resistance to what is.

Otherwise our sense of separation begins to dissolve,
we move from our head into our heart,
and go from a place where we think we know
to a very soft space in the heart

From the egoic point of view
it's vital we remain in conflict to some extent,
and that's why,
when we look at the world around us,
we see so much conflict among human beings"



good, eh?

and don't believe it,
experience:
today,
(for the rest of our lives):
all suffering is a demand
of the ego,
that we are obeying,
for separation and conflict with What Is

Day 20: Sending self-love

If we are trying to stay present, and we are "just" there,
just now,
just experiencing, awaring, nowing
the now of now

and all that
it's a quiet place

looking at a tree doesn't
come with a voice narration,
unless we are talking inside,

going about our business
doesn't come with voice narrations
on "I didn't do this well enough,"
or
"I wonder what so and so thinks
about this and that I did or said."
and the old bugaboo:
"I wonder if so and so even likes
me"

So: being present, we
just "are" with what is
("just")

and other times, the voice takes
over
and we have our interpretation
of reality
our narration
our inner yap yap

and then we aren't present

many, many times to not be present
is to suffer
to feel discomfort
or worse

good,
we can be present to our discomfort
and feel the voice inside has something to do with it

today's game:

coming to the arms and legs and spine present
and sending a little "I love you"
"I approve of you"
to ourselves,
and then returning to as much silence
as we can find

not affirmation
not over and over,
just a shot of love
a shot of approval
for our thinking, our feeling, our awaring ,
our forgetting to aware,
whatever we are at that moment,
loving it

and then moving on

all restlessness
unhappiness
worry
doubt

all that converted into
self love

and then back to arms and fingers, legs and toes, spine and pelvis
head,

grounded in the bones
add on the breathing if you wish

and listen for the happiness in
the silence

and when the unsilence comes:
"I love you"
"I approve"
"You are wonderful"

Just a little whisper of self love

that's all

"Just" a whisper

and hey: let's add a Thich Nhat Hahn thing:
a hint of a smile on the outbreath as and after
we sent the whisper

"just" a hint of a smile

good

Full package, now we are in the middle of the month

 beautiful waters

in California mountains

when I did a yoga certification

in a month of high elevation

learning and love

Body: sensing arms , legs, fingers, toes , spine

Sensing bottom of the spine and sexual area. (On or zero, a tidy property unlike emotions, and thoughts which can be on/ zero/negative)

Emotions : sensing breathing , aware of emotional state in present

Head:
Aware of & not believing " thoughts"
Aware of voice tone of "thoughts"
= words in the head
Sensing tongue & relaxing
Eyes: light coming in
Ears: sound coming in

Soul:
Aware of awareness
In love with the being alive thing

Day 18: Earth, air , sky: three brains, all awake at once????

                              

Rain in Northern California. 

Not so humid. 

Colder. 

Equally wonderful as rain in Texas. 

The sky blessing the Earth with water.

If we want to sense our blood, 

we can add water to today's mindful package.

We stand on the Earth, if you are lucky enough to start the day with
bare foot tai chi,
or just happy enough in your body,
and living somewhere where you can sneak
off
those shoes and socks
or sandals and
wiggle your toes on grass, or in sand, or ????

And we stand sit lie on the Earth
or in the gravity field
full time
until we
die
or go into outer
space

So, like yesterday, awaring
gravity
is a good way to "ground" ourselves.



And mid level, our lungs need feeding constantly
air
in,
and we need to let the gunk out
breathe out
whatever our bodies
need to let go of in that air realm.
CO2, and what else?

Sometimes an extra long outbreath
feels so good for us

And awaring our breath
especially in the "frame"
of arms and legs and spine,
makes it pretty clear
about this minor detail:
we are
alive

right

NOW


And then, up high, our heads have eyes, and
the light comes down through the sky,
and we can look up,
if in a room to the ceiling,
if near a window or outside,
how high can we look

And this, earth, air, sky,
gives a nice fullness to
Life on Earth

A nice project for today
perhaps,
staying aware of air
aware of gravity
aware of light and the sky

I feel lengthened just thinking about
and sensing and awaring all three at once

how about you?

17: Mindful Walking, (and sitting)

As part of meditation practices all over the world people have realized that sitting forever and ever
is both narrow and beside the point of being in life

so you get to get up now and then
and walk slowly and pay attention to your walking

this is fun
and we walk a lot in the day

and today:
pay attention to : when is your weight on your heel
and when is it on the front of the foot

and when you are not walking:
come back to gravity and breath:
are you leaning forward or back in your chair?
what is the shape of your spine?

and those sweet arms and legs:
where are they

good

16: Gravity and breath

Writing each day is fun and not fun
To have made the decision completely knocks
out the "Do I really want to make the effort today?"
thing

And it's sweet in a way, to have the next day's possibility
looming overnight

Today, happily, I woke and soon knew what today's
topic/ focus would be:

And didn't feel like getting on the computer for awhile,
so I got to "test drive" it for awhile.

It's a good one.

And, like almost each day so far,
if we could do it even a "little more,"
the change in our whole life and
being
could be
magnificent

And the title says it:
Gravity:
sense our bodies in gravity
feel the spine arms legs shape in gravity

and
breath

notice the breath
that animates
this life we are in

As an interesting (or not) aside:
gravity and breathing are not part of
our womb experience, except the very slightest
feeling of gravity shifting as our mother lies or stands
(and we're "upside down" for months. I wonder
wonder
wonder
what that sets up for us)

Anyway:
come out of the world
and gravity is much bigger
and breathing is a full time thing

and so,
unless we are in outer space,
gravity and breath give
us an ongoing way to not
only
orient ourselves in
the world
but to
be
present

as well


Good

15: "Thinking" as voices in our head

HAPPY TODAY.
sensing arms
and legs

or better order: right leg, right arm, left arm, left leg

and spine

and breath

and light

and sound

and then there's the pesky "voices in the head"
we call thinking

they have a voice tone

what is it?

often we are talking/ arguing/ scolding/ complaining/ pleading/ bargaining
with someone else as part of our inner chatter

who is it?

is our voice tone different person to person
and emotional underlay to emotional underlay.

What is the point of all this?

To wake up to the craziness of all this inner chatter?
Kind of.

To know ourselves?
Kind of.

To know what "issues" are bugging us?
Kind of.

To be present to everything
we are experiencing,
including our inner conversations with people
who aren't there?

Yes, that too.

Enjoy.

Day 14: Toes of one foot, fingers of opposite hand and...

Let's make it simple today
Sense one of your feet. Fully. Easily.
Sweetly. Gently.

Sense all five toes, or however many you have.

Now sense the opposite hand
and all its fingers.

Sense them as pairs if
you want to get fancy:
thumb-big toe
little toe-little finger
and so on all the way inbetween

Add on breathing and anything else you
want

start like
now
as you read this,
so I'll let the words ramble a little more
while you catch five toes
in the awareness net and then
loop in five fingers

when that set of ten is feeling saturated,
switch to the other diagonal,
but let it be a nice long while

Good.

Day 13: Breath, voice, arms, spine, legs

We spend a fair amount of time talking talking to others

talking in our heads
sometimes to ourselves
often to others, in imaginary conversations

And then there is the whole new world
of texting talking fingers do the tapping
and the screen lights up
and a soundless message is send''

eyes and no sounds
and this may be
a profound disturbance of
the original order of
voice
sound
see another person hearing
your sounds
hear your own voice making your sounds
hear their voice making their sounds

hang around
today
in sound

the sound of your voice
the sound of other people's
and the sound of the voice/ chatter / "thinking"
in your head

slow down enough
to listen

and be in breath
and sensing arms legs and spine
as the container for that

Good

Just Remember Yourself, "Just"

 the self

the paint

the world

it could all be exploration

discovery

communication

love

creation

food

?

?

?

the word "just" gets put to use
too slight for what follows,
at times,
maybe even often

today:
"just" remember yourself

that's it.
you can use all or some of the mindfulness
elements
you've been served up
over the last eleven days

or not

"just" remember yourself

how can you tell when you are doing it?
what is "yourself?"

hint: if you are describing your experience
you are remembering your describer,
go deeper,
go now-er:

"just remember yourself."

Good.

Day 11: Spontaneity and Compulsion

Something to do

on a couch.

A non habitual folding and exploring with the back neck ellbow

and foot (and hip) ( The whole self explores....fun)

Sometimes we are stuck and
being human,
our solution is to do the same
thing
we've done over and over,
but maybe do it a little angrier
or a little faster
or a little harder
or with more swearing
or all four

Usually the results are frustration
sometimes injuring ourselves
and almost never getting the stuck thing undone.
Getting life to move along.

If we are stuck,
it's a habit,
or a pattern.

It can also be fear of doing anything
new,
and almost certainly the habit of
using more force and less intelligence when
"stuck."

Oh, well.

The fear thing is worth looking at:
fear of doing it a new way.
The old was feels familiar.
Feels safe.

And......what if we want freedom
and joy in our life?

Then, dadum da dum, da dum,
awareness to the rescue.

We wake up to the present,
and notice what we are doing and
do something different.

Anything different.

Slower, faster, a different angle, a different timing.
Taking a different perspective.
Lots of possibilities that are dependent on the stuck pattern.

And that's our mindfulness game today:

To notice when we "feel" stuck.
Feel that as emotion. In the present.
And feel the sensations that go along with that emotion.
And notice the thoughts that go along with that stuckness.

And try something else.
Different,
or no,
thoughts.

Different body shape, so the sensations will be different.

Even a different emotion,
or almost always better,
the not quite emotion of
curiosity.
Of wonder.
Of discovery.

Try putting wonder and difference into the
stuck place.

See what happens.

Enjoy.

Day ten: Feelings and feeling/ sensation and emotion

 

Feeling and feeling.

What are we feeling, right now, as sensation?

What are we feeling, right now, as emotion?

Put that in the box: arms, legs, spine.

Breathe into the emotion.

Watch it. What does it want?

Where does it want you to move, you know: e-motion.

Don’t believe it too much, just feel the tug.

Sensations: where are they.

What do they feel like as lived in now experience.

That’s enough.

That’s huge.

Good.

Day 9: Some story and a nature orientation to our mindfulness

 Home grown food, in a second big garden in Sonoma, a later story, the Chris and Marlie story.

But food and land and sleeping outside and making big gardens (the smallest at 1/3 acre, the largest at 3 out of an available 5 acres) are part of the running theme of Sonoma. (And Feldenkrais/ Anat Baniel come along then. And the work of Byron Katie. Good times. Below's a beginning introduction.)

Once upon a time I was enthralled with healing the Earth. I am dedicated to it, just now, but not enthralled. But then, I was living in Berkeley and making a living taking advantage of landscape design and garden creating as chance to do the Gurdjieff meditation full time, and was more or more obsessed with high quality food and the Berkeley farmers markets. I got to know the farmers, got to love and thrive on the food and had this wish: move to the country, become an organic farmer, do it.

This gal I was with, Jeri Lynn, was a garden lover too, and she finished her masters degree in Landscape Architecture and we both wanted out of Berkeley, no matter how amazing it was. To top that off, I’d had the good fortune to “try” out a Permaculture course, and Bill Mollison was one of the two teachers, and my question of “How in the hell are they going to teach about gardening for two weeks,” become, “How did I not know this system for relating to the Earth as a whole? I wanted access to land.

We found the place: Sonoma, California, about an hour from the bay area. We visualized a cottage with meadow and woods and creek and got them. There was a public garden, 5 acres donated by a school teacher on her death to the city of Sonoma, being managed by the Sonoma Ecology Center. The farmer there was going crazy.

After a summer of growing amazing food and making about 50 cents a pound on organic tomatoes, I was ready to take advantage of this land, which needed a visionary and an active garden maker, but I didn’t want a farm. I wanted a total permaculture ecological demonstration garden. There was already a water system and a straw bale barn on the place, and I put in grape arbors and paths and created a double ring of fruit trees with a circumferences of 150 and 130 feet. Vegetables inside. Lavender and thyme and rose beds elsewhere.

The Garden continues, now called the Sonoma Garden park. I got about 3 acres up and running ( there was a square orchard already as part of the given), and then this and that happened.

That’s for later.

For now, for today, to continue the mindfulness play:

take nature into your mindfulness practice today.

See how much time you can sneak or creak or zip or zap outdoors and spend time walking or bike riding or swimming, with a couple of places for your attention.

One: the glory of nature.

Two: your body in motion, and the pleasure of that, and the actual sensation of where your arms and legs and spine-pelvis-head are.

Three: the light coming in thing.

Four: the sound coming in thing.

Five: Feelings and thoughts as flickerings. Be mindful of them as additions to the first four and then come back to now and nature, if you can.

Gently.

If we yank ourselves into being present, it’s not really going to work.
Nature (usually) doesn't yank (though the waves do crash and the lightning does strike and the fires do burn, and today: let's do the breezes and the grass growing up to delight in the sun aspect of our nature.

Day Eight: Laziness is Next to Godliness

 

I had a very fun teacher in the Gurdjieff work once. He smoked and swore and ate politically uncorrect 

and

would do all three while watching TV and use that occasion as a great place to practice meditation.

You remember the Gurdjieff meditation: what we’ve built up so far:

Sense both arms

Sense both legs

Pay attention to sound coming in from the world

Pay attention to reflected light coming in to your eyes

A nice way to watch television, or read the computer, or read a book, or watch a movie, or talk to a friend, or write a blog entry into the cyberworld.

So be it.

He had a name, which we’ll call David, and he had some great sayings:

One was

“Laziness is next to Godliness.”

An obvious play on the old

Cleanliness is next to Godliness, which is soooo Good, eh?

And did he mean don’t make efforts to remember yourself?

Skip to vigilance of paying attention?

Who knows.

He’s dead.

What do you think?

What do you think to juice of “Laziness is next to Godliness” is?

That’s your mindful practice today.

To be lazy in releasing certain “try harder” ways. To be lazy in releasing certain, “get this and this and this done, sooner than now” ways.

To be very lazy about speaking up on behalf of the Judge inside who wants to tell you that you aren’t “doing enough.”

To be super lazy about speaking up
inside or out
about how others should “get their act together.”

Be lazy on the advice to others.
Be lazy on saying what you think is so important, so

Important that you need to

Interrupt

Be lazy.

Listen.

Be lazy.

Wait.

Be present while listening.

Be present while waiting.

Be lazily present today.

That’s a nice present to yourself.

Mindfulness Day 7: What about Heaven?

 

What about heaven?

Heaven is our natural state. When we are

Present
and honestly present and so
no words pulled in from the past storage banks, just

Now &

Now &

Now

So today, try this: be mindful of how soothing and pleasant it is
to “just”

Be

Be in your breathing if you wish

Be in sensing arms and legs and fingers and toes

Be in sensing your spine

Be light coming in and

Sound coming in

If that pleases and amuses you

(Bach, when asked about why he composed thousands of works of music and had umpteen children, said:

“For my own amusement and the

glory of God.”
Pretty good, eh?)

Just Be

Enjoy the ease of that

and here’s the deal: when unhappiness or discomfort or annoyance or any of that

Shit

Sneaks in

Smile and look for the “should” or “shouldn’t” in your thinking

This is the next stage in mindfulness, of course<

Be in the body

Be in the breath

Sense look and listen

And then watch thoughts, especially the “should” and “shouldn’t”
so called “thoughts (auditory hallucinations) try to steal our

Real selves away

and who and what is our real self?

find out this heaven in the quiet of real now
and when your mind thoughts up,
like a mirror fogging up,
notice:

Ah, unhappiness,
Ah, “should” or “shouldn’t” thought

Then maybe come back to reality

Enjoy

Day Six: Let there be (awaring of) Light

 

Let there be

Light

To be in the world and

In ourselves at the same time

to have the arrow of

Attention
pointing both out
and

In

Life. This is life. To be aware of our

Bodies as

Arms all the way out to ten fingers &

Legs all the way out to ten toes &

Spine with the pelvis at the bottom and head at top &

Breathing in

Breathing out

that is a nice basis for operating

and then the outer world in its simplest
form

Or better said: our perceiving of the outer world
in our most crucial and ongoing and “important” modes

listening to sounds outside our heads
noticing light coming in our eyes

Reflected light the Gurdjieff meditation likes to say

Bounding

Happily off something in front of you (unless you are looking straight at the sun or a light or a flame) and then dancing

Dancing

Streaming

Flying

Soaring

Lilting

Into You

(whatever You is, who ever You are:

who is the You

sensing the arms and legs and

Noticing the breathing and

Awaring the sounds coming in and
Presencing the reflected light coming to You)

That’s a fine question
to have floating in the background

and for today

play
if you will
with the joy of the now of all the sensing and breathing
and listening and looking

(and paying attention to reflected light is

not quite the same as looking
and that’s okay)

fill up at the fount of

Now

Enjoy

Happiness 202: Life is Yes, and can get better and better

It's a good day yes
and then
fine
what's not to be happy about?

It's a "bad" day
and what a minute..
slow down,
what's going on right now

this now now
of your so called "bad" day

sense it,
in your body:

what is
now
yeah yeah
the now now
now
what is going on,
as sensation
in the moment

and what is
now
going on as your feeling?

can you take your feeling as emotion
e-motion (which way does it want to send, take, lead you?)
and feeling
as sensation

and add on this:
I/ me/ the one inside all the dancing
am aware
of those feelings/ sensations

we'll get to this later
on mindfulness in emotion
and mindfulness in sensation
and most of all
mindfulness as inquiry into "thoughts"

that's all coming in the thirty days,
and today we just add on light

but I was in the mood to write two blog posts
today,
to get the number of the posts (506)matching that today's posting
will be day 6 in the mindfulness derby)

so this is an extra

and a good idea
to put into action if
you can:

life is yes
even to your "unhappiness"

and the "yes" is noticing,
watching
experiencing
being open to
accepting
loving

think of what your "unhappiness"
is up to
as a child
your child
that you would and could
love to help comfort love
and
so
on

so all the yeses pile up
and life can get even better

how?
think of something wonderful
you want to do
or feel
or think
or say

next

and do
feel
think
or say

it


Good.

Day 5: Real sounds vs auditory hallucinations = "thinking"

 

Today is immense.

All days are immense.

Practice this today:

Take the deep “bones” of awareness we have so

Far

Two arms

Two legs (all the toes, all the fingers)

Spine pelvis head

Sense the five lines and your

Breathing

Add on this amazing distinction
(recall from other blogs: the food for the brain,
for real learning is the awareness of differences
that make a difference)

Sounds outside your head, in the

World

&

Auditory hallucinations of various words in your head that
we call
“thinking”

That’s it:

All day, all night till sleep:
Five lines: sense
Breath: notice and enjoy
Sounds outside: Listen and enjoy.
Sounds inside: Listen and realize > this is a hallucination,
And hear the voice tone of the inside “words in your head”

That’s plenty, that’s

Huge and so is

Life

Good

Breathing with the power belly: independence, joy, discovery, love, life, mindfulness day 4

 

July 4, 2012

Independence Day:

People who work with breathing and who work with “bodies”
have lots of rules:
breathe this way
move that way
this is the correct posture
no strain no gain

And this isn’t mindfulness
the full

Mind in what we do

let’s breathe again today,
more or less the “opposite” of yesterday
and let’s add on the pelvis and head as the

“Middle Line”
of a

five line being we are connecting with
as a daily and ongoing meditation:

Two arm lines

two leg lines

the pelvis spine head line

And breathing (is there more?
sure,
we’ve got 27 more days to fill with
more and more

de

lightful

mind

ful

ness)

So, sit comfortably

Way at the front of the chair

(as my qigong guy says: So your genitals
are hanging off into the air,

Or as I’d say: so your pelvis is on the chair
and your legs are off)

put both hands on your forehead

Elbows pointed forward

First yesterday’s breathing:

Bend down, round your back,
bring your elbows toward your belly
let your belly go back and in
as you breathe out
and squeeze the air out

Add on pelvis awareness
and rock back on your pelvis as you round down

Feel your chest sinking,

Feel your head and pelvis moving “as if”
towards each other

Feel the whole pelvis head spine line

And

And

And

Keep awareness in both arms and both legs

now, after the air is out and your are as
curled up as you are going to be,
push your belly forward

Breathe in

Rock forward on your pelvis,
Lift your head, connected to your arms
towards the sky
and feel the pelvis spine head line
and two arms and two legs
and

Breathing in

Do this happily a number of times.

Now rest

Now, put the hands again on your forehead
again elbows forward

And bend down, elbows toward belly,
pelvis spine head all a unit,
and SUCK IN AIR

This is going to be “different”

Hell yeah

Good!

Belly squeezed way in

And

Suck in

Air

To your lungs

To your lower back

Suck

Suck

As you curl up

(again two arms, two legs,
this is life

Life is big)

At the bottom pause,

And as you push your belly forward

THRUST  (gently) your pelvis so your butt
rocks back and the top near your belly moves forward

As you move forward a bit on the chair

And PUSH the AIR OUT

ARCHING breathing out lifting your spine long and

Full in this

Curve

Then, come back down and in and curling up

Folding in

SUCKING THE AIR IN

AS YOUR BELLY PUSHES SMALL

Get small and round and full of air

In your back and lungs,

And then push the air out

Thrust your belly forward

Let your hands and arms and back and pelvis

All lift your gaze towards the sky

Many times

Rest

And then play with three of each

Type of breathing

No right way:

One, in my opinion,

“relaxes”

The other, again, my opinion,

Is a power stroke,

As if with a martial arts thrust

You feel and sense and notice what they are

Like to

You

Good

Day 3: Mindful breathing with our spine in motion....fun

 

Breathing in and out, and including the spine

Here’s what we have so far:

Breathing in

Breathing out

With awareness

Plus sensing, our

Legs with all ten toes

Arms, with all ten fingers

Today, let’s add the spine to this, and in a fun way where we linked breathing to a flexing and extending of the spine.

Place your right hand on your head, with your elbow pointed forward. ( If you can. If not, put your hand on your face or chin, with elbow as forward as it can point).

Sense both arms and both legs and your spine.

Breathe out and bend forward, as if your elbow is going between your knees, and the bending down is pushing air out of your belly. (Or the pushing air out of your belly is helping you round over).

Go very slowly. Enjoy this.

Lift you head back up, pushing your belly forward and let your head point a little (not a lot, do NOT go near any limit) toward the ceiling and feel and arch in your back.

Breathe in as your belly comes forward and your head lifts.

Now breathe out and round your spine and bring your elbow toward the ground. Feel the spine changing shape as you do this gently many times.

Sense your arms and legs as you do this.

Take a rest. Enjoy sensing your spine and arms and legs and breathing without any shape changing.

Now, if you feel adventurous, take your right hand again to your head, and take your left knee with your left hand, and as you breathe out, bring your knee and elbow toward each other. Do NOT try to touch them, even if you can. Just breathe and enjoy rounding.

Then breathe in and let your knee down and belly forward arch your back and point your right elbow toward the sky or ceiling.

Many times, gently. You may rest at any time. And try the arms the other way.

Enjoy, slow, gentle, aware, enjoy.

mindful day two: a "box" around the breathing in, breathing out delight

 

Breathing in and breathing out is

"close to"

Who we are as living beings

And it is also close to the “Feeling” area of our life
the chest
the ribs
the heart inside the lungs where the breathing takes place
the diaphragm below the lungs, where
lots of emotions hang out

so, a good next step in our mindfulness,
as even now,
we notice our in and out breathing

is to add a “box”
a container
to this middle of ourselves breathing in and breathing out

The box is this:
2 arms
2 legs
our spine

We can at any moment we are awake
“sense” the arms and legs and spine

And let’s start now:
(now always being just the right
time to become more present)

Let’s start with the right leg:
all five toes up to the hip joint
sense all of the leg you can
enjoy how big a part of us this is
enjoy how this foot and toe awareness begins
very much
to “ground” us

Now sense all the fingers of your right hand
now
as you read this
all the fingers of your right hand and then the rest of  your right
arm
all the way to the shoulder

all along
sense the breathing in and breathing out

(“hard?” , oh well, it’s just
our life we are paying more attention to,
with great advantages down the road
when we can cease and desist demands for
attention/ ATTENTION/ attention
from others)

breathing in

breathing out

right toes and leg

right fingers and arm

and add on

left upper arm at the shoulder

all the way down to the five left fingers

And the left leg
from hip joint all the way to the five toes

actually,
that’s enough
let’s leave the spine until tomorrow

try this game today:
ten fingers
ten toes
two arms
two legs
breathing in
breathing out

This is “a lot”

YES!

Life is a lot.

(You can do this when happy, and when sad,

doing nothing

taking a walk, swimming, driving

reading on your computer

even,

and we’ll work on this later:

while talking to someone else,

it’s an open eyed mindfulness
rooting us in the reality of these arms and legs
that reach and touch and move us around
and shake hands and write and hug and open a door
and this

breathing thing
breathing in
breathing out

we are alive

isn’t that a good feeling to be sensing

the aliveness of our bones and fingers and toes and
are breathing?)