Friday, July 20, 2012

Day 20: Sending self-love

If we are trying to stay present, and we are "just" there,
just now,
just experiencing, awaring, nowing
the now of now

and all that
it's a quiet place

looking at a tree doesn't
come with a voice narration,
unless we are talking inside,

going about our business
doesn't come with voice narrations
on "I didn't do this well enough,"
"I wonder what so and so thinks
about this and that I did or said."
and the old bugaboo:
"I wonder if so and so even likes

So: being present, we
just "are" with what is

and other times, the voice takes
and we have our interpretation
of reality
our narration
our inner yap yap

and then we aren't present

many, many times to not be present
is to suffer
to feel discomfort
or worse

we can be present to our discomfort
and feel the voice inside has something to do with it

today's game:

coming to the arms and legs and spine present
and sending a little "I love you"
"I approve of you"
to ourselves,
and then returning to as much silence
as we can find

not affirmation
not over and over,
just a shot of love
a shot of approval
for our thinking, our feeling, our awaring ,
our forgetting to aware,
whatever we are at that moment,
loving it

and then moving on

all restlessness

all that converted into
self love

and then back to arms and fingers, legs and toes, spine and pelvis

grounded in the bones
add on the breathing if you wish

and listen for the happiness in
the silence

and when the unsilence comes:
"I love you"
"I approve"
"You are wonderful"

Just a little whisper of self love

that's all

"Just" a whisper

and hey: let's add a Thich Nhat Hahn thing:
a hint of a smile on the outbreath as and after
we sent the whisper

"just" a hint of a smile


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